He would, if he wasn’t too busy micromanaging and punishing the masturbators of the world.
Stephen Colbert made a mockery of his “hero” Papa Bear O’Reilly once again this Thursday evening: Colbert Skewers Bill O’Reilly’s Bizarre Defense Of Inequality:
Spotlighting a Tuesday rant from the Fox host’s “The O’Reilly Factor,” Colbert took a moment on Thursday night’s show to praise O’Reilly’s unique take on racial and economic inequality in America. (Short version: it’s pointless to fight it.)
Ostensibly beginning as a critique of the liberal agenda to reduce income inequality, O’Reilly’s lecture soon took a bizarre turn.
"Each human being is born with abilities, but they are not equal abilities," the Fox host said. "I will never have physical equality with my fellow Irishman, Shaquille O’Neal! He’s bigger and stronger than I am, by nature."
Colbert called O’Reilly’s logic airtight: “Trying to achieve equality is unnatural! I mean take income inequality — Shaquille O’Neal is taller than Bill O’Reilly, therefore the richest 1 percent of Americans should control 40 percent of the nation’s wealth.”
Summing up, Colbert seized on O’Reilly’s declaration: “There will never be equality in this world, it’s impossible! An opium-laced dream!”
"Yes!" shouted Colbert, "I believe that’s what Dr. [Martin Luther] King was talking about in his, ‘I Have An Opium-Laced Dream’ speech!"
Lying scumbag publishes book full of lies for other dumb scumbags.
More delicious creationist tears over a science documentary. You know their continued boo-hooing about it only means the show’s popularity is having an impact.
Are you telling me these things to, like, absolve yourself of feeling guilty about your cruel religion? I’m just asking, does it make you feel like you can just wipe your hands and walk away and if my soul burns forever (or whatever) you can shrug and say ‘i tried to warn him’? Surely, you must know I’ve heard these allegations before. The concept you’re presenting isn’t new, it’s the same old threat they dangled over my head when I was 8-years-old. At that age I obeyed, because the threat was scary and it was easy to just say yes, but in my heart of hearts, I knew people who said the things you’re saying now were full of shit. That you didn’t have any better justification for believing in hell or Jesus or sins than people who believed in elves, magic and fairies had.
Guilt is a powerful feeling. And you’re looking to absolve yourself of it. Religion won’t do it, my friend. I don’t know what you feel so guilty about, but getting other people to adopt the same superstitions you hold won’t change whatever it was.
If there was any chance you were right about heaven and hell and Jesus, your argument that “it is true” is not convincing and, therefore, you have failed. If you are right and my soul burns forever, it will be partially your fault, because you, like so many others, failed to meet simple standards of evidence.
I hate that passive-aggressive shit my family likes to do when my atheism is the topic of discussion. For example: my aunt and I were heading to the supermarket and my cousin was asking questions. My aunt just says how she believes I’ll believe again because you can never stop believing. Then a…
Just remember that’s your family attempting to shield their beliefs from your logic. It’s not about aggression toward you, there being defensive because encased within any religious belief, is the compulsion to defend it against any challengers without actually having to hear out the challenge.
You can always just roll your eyes and check in with atheism blogs.
As if not raising the minimum raise would keep them steady. I guess when you’re as privileged as they are it’s easy to ignore rising prices and bury your nose in Fischer-Price’s “My First Economics Textbook.”